Hello girls.
Well I’m writing to you after on of the most awkward first dates ever. Bearing in mind it’s the first proper one I’ve been on since breaking up.
This was a full on one on one meal with a guy I met drunkenly in a club for about 20mins who ended up with my number. Smooth.
I wouldn’t normally agree to meet up with someone I barley knew but thanks to some persistent persuasion from my best friend I just though ‘stuff it!’ And went. I was approaching the date with negative feelings. The poor guy!
The whole what do I wear thing proved problematic! After raiding my wardrobe and moving all its contents to the floor and bed, I went for a Topshop pair of shorts, tights, ankle boots and a silk top.
I was completely hanging from a night out the previous night and felt awful. Not to mention I panic when put in socially strange situations, especially when it involves food. So I was off to a great start.
On arriving there, he didn’t look anything like the tequila had told me and I hadn’t Facebook stalked him to know that either. But he seemed nice enough. He was quite sweet in that he had booked us a table and he even pulled my chair out for me. He had a lovely smile too.
But from then on it was the most awkward 2 hours ever. I was thinking of ways to get out of it! I could feel myself panicking and just feeling really anxious. He ordered a bottle of wine and out of politeness I forced myself to sip some when really I could still feel last nights bottles of wine churning in my stomach. I had my girlfriend Amelia lined up to be my scape goat. I didn’t use her as I would have felt too awful but the thought did cross my mind. I tried to relax by playing with the bottle top.
He hadn’t picked up on my nervousness and didn’t do much to make me feel relaxed. There was absolutely zero banter which is a must for me. When we did get chatting, he didn’t understand mine and I was left laughing at my own jokes several times…
I’m actually quite shy and the concept of eating with a complete stranger threw me off a little. Usually I would have picked it up a starter with my hands and popped it in my mouth but having to be all finicky with a knife and fork over a limp piece of wet bread with soggy tomatoes on, proved too much and I couldn’t eat more than 2 mouthfuls.
So far, to be fair, he had done everything by the book and I did notice how much he was trying which was really refreshing. Even pouring the wine (help!) but I just wasn’t feeling it. I was panicky, hung over and felt awkward because he just wasn’t talking! I kept chatting away and then when I asked him something there was an awkward silence. Every time it went silent he did this thing where he pouted him lips, kissed his teeth and nodded, adding in the occasional hum… It made me cringe like hell! This made it even more awkward.  I should also mention that he dropped the bomb that he had just turned 19…i wanted to give my head a wobble!
After an awful course of mains I was ready to leave. I felt like I had just ran the marathon and the conversation was running dry. I have never felt so relieved getting into a taxi.
I sat thinking about it in the car on the way back, and although he had been sweet enough it was the most awkward 2 hours I’ve had in a long time and I couldn’t even drink the wine to allow myself to relax into it. Was I ready to start dating again? Well, yeah! But il go for something a lot less formal and with someone who I actually have a connection with, otherwise it’s just plain awkward! I wanted to get home and curl up in bed !….And then I remembered the clothes that had been dispersed all over it. Pain in the ass!
So that’s my first experience of meeting up for a date with a stranger and is safe to say I won’t be doing it again! Even though he’s asked me again. Surely he can’t have thought it went well??
I felt quite empowered and very flattered at the whole concept of it, but in all honesty, I didn’t enjoy the feeling before or during the date and the surge of relief I felt after that, was justification. Next time, I’m going to go with my gut. I will not be following up any 20 minute drunken conversations with random men…sorry…boys (cringe!) again.
 Just thought I’d share it with you girlies. Little life trials  😉 have you ever had any bad first dates? I’d love to hear about them! Share and share alike ladies 😉
Keep the power gorgeous girlies!
Love Sophie x