Frame up your life

Hi everyone, Well I haven’t written for sometime mainly because I have been doing some ‘reframing work’.. ‘as a comedian? I hear some of you say’ So what do I mean?… Well any fine artist will tell you that a great picture needs a great frame, a cheap or damaged frame can ruin a fabulous piece of artwork, some would go as far as to say that the frame is also a piece of great artwork in itself. Some frames are made by gifted craftsmen and designed specifically for the painting, maybe they are made from fine gold, embossed and jewelled. The frame completes priceless beauty and presents the painting to the world. In life you are the work of fine art,… Read More →

Dr Pam: Breaking up is hard to do!

Dear Dr Pam, I’ve just turned 30 and haven’t had a proper relationship for three years now. For the past three or four months I’ve been seeing a guy I’d known for about a year. I know he really likes me but I don’t feel like I can give him any more than what I’m already giving him. I see him about once a week, we sleep together, I don’t text or call him much. I know he wants more and it’s not right to string him along. I do like him, I enjoy the sense of companionship, but I really am not interested in having a relationship with him. This whole situation has kind of snowballed and now I… Read More →

I found Viagra in his bag  

Dear Dr. Pam I’m in my 30s and I have never been attracted to older men. But a few months ago I met a guy who is in his late 50s and really like how mature and inelegant he is. When he asked me out, I said yes! We had a fantastic first date and I really fell for him. Since then we’ve been going on regular dates and we’ve became close. Although he told me that he really likes me, our relationship was mainly emotional, not so much physical. But a couple of weeks ago he invited me to go to a hotel or a long weekend. We had an amazing time and finally had sex. Everything was going… Read More →

Dr Pam: I hate being the one to initiate sex!  

Dear Dr. Pam, I feel like a freak because I’m always the one to initiate sex with my partner. It makes me think  there’s something wrong with me or with him and I’m starting to hate initiating it. You grow up thinking men will hit on you for sex but after six years together it’s the opposite. When we get around to having sex it’s always great. But he never looks for sex. It seems he would go for months without it. What’s happening? This is really hitting my self-confidence and we are heading for arguments, I’m losing patience. I want to feel as if he wants me. Thank you! Gerri Dear “Wants to feel womanly”, I can tell you’re… Read More →

He’s obviously a game player

Dear Dr. Pam, There’s this guy I really like and we flirt quite a bit but my friend (who knows him quite well) has warned me about him. She says he’s really into playing the field and has even read books that tells you how to pick up women. From my minimal research I think he seems to have used a few tricks from such a book on me. Thing is, I really like him and I want to get to know him better but I don’t want to get caught up in his game playing. How do I get closer to him? Thank you!! Dear “Gameplaying magnet”, Oh dear it sounds like you’re falling for his tricks and game-playing…. Read More →

My boyfriend is far too cosy with his ex!

Dear Dr Pam, I’ve been with my boyfriend for nine months and he was previously with a woman for seven years. In that time they were engaged but obviously never got married. They have managed to stay on good terms as they own a house together that they haven’t been able to sell, at least he says they haven’t got a good offer. He moved out and she’s presently staying there. I’m happy they get along because they must get their house sold but I was shocked to find out he gave her a birthday present a couple weeks ago. Am I wrong to feel angry inside and also dejected about the whole thing if I’m honest? Casey, 31  … Read More →

Athena and her secret message

Hi, Last month I read this online article called ‘Athena’s secret message’ and had to share it with you…   As someone who has scrapped through life so far with the usual amounts of cuts and bruises that we all have, it is so easy to feel overwhelmed by the issue –  ‘what is my life about?’ Here is a young girl who sadly died of cancer whose parents found some unbelievable words written on the back of a long mirror in her bedroom. I wanted to share her words because they bring about essentially what life is truly about.  Whatever our circumstance in life, sometimes it is wise to pause and ponder the issue of LIFE. We can’t choose the start… Read More →

Dr Pam: He wants to propose but i’m not ready!

Dear Dr Pam, I recently overheard my boyfriend tell his mum that he’s going to propose to me on our one year anniversary in July.   I like my boyfriend and suspect I could fall in love with him, but I don’t ever want to get married. At least not now as I’m still only in my late 20s although he is a bit older, 33. Here’s the tough part as two years ago he ended up depressed, to the point of being suicidal, when he split up with his ex and I’m afraid rejecting his proposal will result in the same. How do I let him down gently? Is there any way I can? Thanks for your help, Jill… Read More →

Healthy Happy Fit Mums – Introducing Lucy Miller

MIW Welcomes you LUCY MILLER! As the resident ‘mum’ on the panel of girls that make up Miss Independent Women – The Ultimate Girls Site; I wanted to share some of Lucy’s brilliant tips for keeping fit and healthy throughout pregnancy. For those of you who don’t know, Lucy is a Freelance Fitness & Nutrition Editor for Health & Fitness Mag, Mail Online, Weight Watchers, Fertility Road,  Glamour magazine & founder of Fitness and the Bump In between juggling a family life of her own, she manages her busy schedule of working with her clients as a Personal Trainer and is also working with children to keep fit as a trained level 2 Children’s Fitness Specialist. So I took some time out from heavily pregnant… Read More →

Diversity, Families and Spot the difference

Love it or hate it the UK is a country of diversity, family and spotting the difference, but should we?  Or is it still rude to stare and point? In food we ‘taste the difference’ in society we ‘spot the difference’ – is it OK? ‘Where are your parents?’ I was often asked at school ‘Behind me’ I would quietly say trying hard to blink back tears of shame, as an 8-year-old girl… ‘Are they? I can’t see them’, was a regular inquisition I would suffer at sports days and school events. This a very common script to any child who is either adopted, fostered or just doesn’t look like their parents. Being inquisitive is natural for children and adults… Read More →